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So we're all having a barbecue...

Talk about Contests and games

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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Lyria on Sat Feb 03, 2007 12:01 pm

Mike finds the remains of some food and follows the trail of bones and so on untilhe finds Dev and Sinister with the secret stash of food they had and were sharing out, well not so much sharing as fighting over :roll:

The Bean is now on the phone spending his winnings like it's going out of fashion.

FuMo is sulking and demanding a repeat of the armwrestling but DGO is having none of it! He tells his mate he's busy with Lyria still and is likely to be so for some hours.

Nev decides that whilst IanK is asleep he'll use some of the girls earrings and put them in his wounds to give him a punk rocker look. Iank is wildly impressed when he wakes up and asks the girls to stab him with their heels some more.

As the sun begins to rise again a huge lorry comes into view, it's the first of a huge delivery for the Bean.
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Nev on Sat Feb 03, 2007 8:41 pm

Nev and Missy panic about where they are going to put all of The Bean's new toys. :D
Jesus must have been black - he called everyone "brother," enjoyed gospel and didn't get a fair trial.

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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Dev on Sun Feb 04, 2007 12:08 pm

Yet everyone gets a shock to see that the toys in question are actually adult toys, and they were all addressed to Nev...

Everyone stares at Nev. Nev pleads his innocence, but no one is buying it...
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Nev on Mon Feb 05, 2007 2:13 am

Closer inspection of the address label shows that the name on it starts with a "D" not "N." The blow-up flamingo should have been a clue...
Jesus must have been black - he called everyone "brother," enjoyed gospel and didn't get a fair trial.

Why is it that if a man talks dirty to a girl it's sexual harassment, but if a girl talks dirty to a man it's £1 per minute?
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby DGO on Mon Feb 05, 2007 6:57 am

The Bean meanwhile is carefully checking off the list of things being delivered against those that were ordered. Clearly, some things have been delivered that the Bean did not order. He starts telling the delivery driver to load all the crap he didn't order back onto the truck and picks up the mobile phone.

Nev and Dev are both seen to be scrambling to hang on to some the stuff the Bean did not order with the explanation that "maybe the Bean didn't order it, but it's still good stuff and I wanna keep it."

The Bean is unmoved by such emotive comments and dials the company he ordered everything from. Both Nev and Dev start looking for places to hide in between nervously shuffling their feet and looking rather guilty.
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Paul on Wed Feb 07, 2007 4:45 pm

Originally posted by Lyria:
Lyria is left lying on the sunlounger saying up a bit DGO, DGO? Are you still there? DGO!!!!!!
Erm I think you'll find that's not a sun longer Lyria :hihi:
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<img src="http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y274/Merlinpfm/LyriasBar.jpg" alt=" - " />
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Funkmother on Wed Feb 21, 2007 10:40 am

So how are you all going for drinks?

Nev wonders whether Missy will ever give him the fat lips smile. ;) Meanwhile, his "yes dear"s are getting louder.

DGO advises Paul of the real Downunder meaning of "a map-o Tassie". The girls are all agahst.

DGO and FuMo agree the best way to transport Oz to the northern hemisphere is to turn it into a hovercraft. The scrap the plan when they realise that, in part, its the inaccessability that gives the place its character. ;)

FuMo meanwhile secretly plots to build a trans-Tasman tunnel to NZ. This happens after he asks Bruce what it was really like with Jane March in Colour of Night.

Chap meditates on the head of a pin.

Okay you lot, after the umteenth rebuild of the BBQ, the steaks are ready. Mike, take over the tongs will ya.

Sin's eyes are doing laps in opposite directions.

FuMo explains to the ladies that the only reason his hands are cool are because they've been in the esky. They don't seem to care. He is overwhelmed by their attentions and faints.

Paul calls on the phone to ask how far it is from Canada to Australia.

FuMo's pleased his distraction of kicking Bruce in the head worked and picks up Chap's spliff...
The metaphorical inuendo flows like chalk.
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Nev on Fri Feb 23, 2007 1:39 am

Nev's "yes dears" are only getting louder in the hope that at the end she will let him get to see her map of Tasmania and greet him with a fat lipped smile. ;)
Jesus must have been black - he called everyone "brother," enjoyed gospel and didn't get a fair trial.

Why is it that if a man talks dirty to a girl it's sexual harassment, but if a girl talks dirty to a man it's £1 per minute?
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Petrol Head on Tue Mar 06, 2007 12:24 pm

...and after 11 days straight of people ignoring Nev, stunned in a paralyzed state, PH decides it's time someone took advantage of this situation and runs off with everyones wallets and in the case of Sin, his purse.
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby DGO on Wed Mar 07, 2007 2:11 pm

The Bean, in his ever-vigilant state notices PH nicking all the wallets and Sin's purse and trips PH on his way out the back gate. PH drops all the wallets - the purse is looped around his neck - and scurries off down the back lane with a couple of bruises and a nasty graze on his nose from when he hit the deck. Sin's purse is last seen floating in the breeze behind PH, rather like the scarf wrapped around the neck of a 60 year old MG driver going 50 mph down a back street with the top down.

Meanwhile back at the BBQ everybody seems to have woken from their alcohol induced stupor - except for Gracious Lady, who is woken from her back rub stupor.

Gracious Lady politely requests that DGO use his special powers to put her back into her state of bliss. DGO complies after refitting his hat with two new bottles of single malt.

Mikapup is trying to resucutate FuMo by licking his face while the other ladies fan him with beer carton lids.

Sin is picking nits again - off himself of course - and wondering whether he should have them fried or grilled.

Dev is trying to revive Bruce Willis whom FuMo kicked into unconsciousness. Nev is pleading with Missy about something or other no-one can hear clearly but the group agree that Nev wants to go on an overseas trip to Australia because he keeps mentioning Tasmania.

Paul is still on the phone waiting for someone to respond to his enquiry and is grateful he made the call collect.

IanK throws some more steaks on the BBQ and then starts jabbing himself with the BBQ fork cause it makes a regular pattern.

And Chap, poor chap, has finally found his pills and in now in the glorious afterglow that is overmedication.

Pretty normal BBQ so far.
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Missy on Wed Mar 07, 2007 5:26 pm

Lyria (still lying on the table in a druken stupor) turns over in her sleep, and falls onto the floor, tipping the table over onto her, knocking all the steak on the floor that Sin was just about to eat. Nev's temper has began to wear thin, so Missy puts her foot down and disallows the trip to tasmania . The bean wants to spend some more of his winnings on his dear old mom, and buys her a night with Robbie Williams, but gets nothing for Nev because he has pissed him off for
shouting at missy. Dev has given up trying to revive Bruce Willis because a bunch of flamingos walked passed him and he forgot about everything else, and nobody else seems to bothered in taking over from him either. IanK made the mistake of jabbing himself to hard with the fork and is running around screaming for an ambulance, but not compleatly sure if anyone is listening to him...
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Funkmother on Wed Aug 11, 2010 6:39 am

(... almost three and a half years later...)

An expedition of explorers from forum.grandprix.com cut through thick jungle with machetes. They come upon a clearing that clearly shows signs of a lost civilisation. It appears that there was some kind of celebration. Food utensils and outdoor furniture are scattered about. It's clear that the site has been abandoned for some time and yet, in the centre of the clearing stands a barbecue and remarkably, the coals are still hot. One of the expedition party, FuMo, adds some wood to the barbecue and quickly brings it back to life. Suddenly, there's a rustling in the bushes on the other side of the clearing. The party all stop in their tracks, wondering what hideous beast might emerge from the untamed jungle. After a moment, the bushes part and Jane March emerges wearing nothing but a grass skirt...
The metaphorical inuendo flows like chalk.
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Dev on Wed Aug 11, 2010 10:59 am

...and right behind her, stood the midget known as Bernie Ecclestone, not even bothering to wear a grass skirt. Everyone was stunned, and no one could say anything, until the silence was shattered by...
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Funkmother on Thu Aug 12, 2010 4:18 am

... by Sinister farting. That reminded everybody they were still on planet earth. They lept upon Bernie killing him before throwing him to the jackals.

"What are we cooking?", said FuMo, "and what do we have to drink?"
The metaphorical inuendo flows like chalk.
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Re: So we're all having a barbecue...

Postby Dev on Thu Aug 12, 2010 6:53 am

"Plenty of seafood, there will be fish, prawns, squids, cockles, crabs, cuttlefish, and everything else sea related" replied Sin.

You could just see the blood draining from FuMo and Lyria's face, while a loud whoop of joy was heard from Dev, Mikapup, Dixonfan and Cougar.

What happened next was shocking though...
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